You Don’t Need More. You Need Less.
3:42am.
You’re staring at your eyelids again.
Sweating, ruminating, fixing in your mind the prospect who’s ghosting you or turned you down.
Or maybe it’s the daytime version. Caught here, Caught there.
Caught staring at your phone. In perpetual loops of worry - why are they doing this? I should be doing that. Images sparking in you a rising tide of anxiety and or anger, sharp in your chest, pinched in your throat, shaping your opinions as they do.
Caught fearful of the coming days / weeks / months.
Why have they not replied?
What happens if they say no?
What will this cost me?
Who am I anyway?
Life on the edge of a worry precipice.
Ready to fall in.
Worries and stresses are real - and share common threads.
I will lose something. Or someone.
I will suffer.
I will let someone down. And be let down.
I am stupid. And make stupid mistakes.
I am not good enough. Or worthy.
I will die.
It’s easy to be caught in the loops of the mind.
There’s a biological element to this too.
The science bit, courtesy of Andrew ‘Uberman’ (like what I did there?).
You scroll, read and see something novel or designed to capture your attention. This ‘search and find’ releases a little hit of dopamine - your body's chemical reward.
After the hit, the crash.
And in the crash, the body seeks response - a craving to taste again the remembered high.
Scroll.
Refresh.
Check email.
Repeat.
Cycling. Deepening. Looping.
Which is why, even right now, sitting here at my desk, the central heated air around me warm, I am drawn to the horror show that is X / Twitter - a ready feed of dopamine fuel: novel, shocking, outrage inducing images and messages. A junkie’s watering hole.
But this isn’t really about social media.
It’s about the condition of your heart and mind - the place from, and tone with, which you think and do.
Are you orienting from an open, wise and creative place?
Or a closed, contracted, fearful place?
Are you in survival mode?
Or generative mode?
LeanMind is a pathway, a practise, to remain steady amidst all this.
How to drop out of the head - home of your panic - into the body, the belly, a cleaner, clearer, steadier place.
Fizz in the head.
Rest in the belly.
Fizz head.
Rest belly.
And repeat.
The head, in this retelling, is like the surface of a raging sea.
By contrast, the deeper you go, the calmer it sits.
At the sea floor, the kelp sways only to the rhythm of the moment, however wild and noisy the sea surface storm.
Which begs the question:
How to be more kelp?
This is the heart of the LeanMind way.
Last week I wrote a manifesto trying to capture that spirit. I share it again below.
If it resonates, send it to someone who might need it.
The LeanMind Manifesto
There comes a time when pushing harder stops working.
Success feels thinner.
The rewards emptier.
You flatter, fatter?
Stuffed full of ideas which no longer fit.
You drift.
Busy.
Bouncing from one idea, stress or worry to the next.
You were taught to add.
Accumulate - habits, hacks, ideas.
Strategise.
Optimise.
Efficiency.
Growth at all costs.
And navigate to the top of your company tree, and the company to the top of its tree.
Maybe you are there. Or have been.
But these ideas are stuffing you up, slowing you down.
The old game is ending.
A new one itching to be born.
You don’t need more.
You need less.
In a noisy world, wise leaders subtract
Your kids need this of you. Your partner.
As do your colleagues, collaborators and co-conspirators.
And, if you’re honest, you need this too.
This is the great simplification -subtracting what no longer fits, holding on less tight, working to a new rhythm, rooted in nature.
This is not about retreat, or burning the metaphorical house down.
It is toward clarity, purpose and meaning.
And in this, there is impact.
I call this the Surfing Sage - the wise leader who works from the inside out, at home and at work.
Someone who aligns their work with ideas bigger than themselves.
Who contributes with and from the heart.
Rooted in spirit, not woo.
Responding rather than reacting.
And walking the path toward steadiness and clarity alongside others.
The rippling effects of these changes are profound -you energised, your family content, the world flowing. Well, more of the time.
We need this now more than ever.
Plug into the rhythms and flows bigger than you.
Mine for your roots.
Embrace rituals.
In a complicated world, wise leaders simplify.
This is the LeanMind way.
There are three old teachings which point us back to living, creating and contributing like kelp - rhythmic, deep lying, steady.
Know The Most Important Thing
“The most important thing is to know the most important thing”, said the Zen teacher Suzuki Roshi.
Not the top ten things.
Not a to-do list as long as your arm.
The most important thing.
This requires focus, clarity and commitment.
Hard but true.
2. Whole And Rich Life In A Small Village
“A whole and rich life can be lived in a small village”, said Lao Tzu.
Your village need not be the old English variety, old skool and conservative (🙃).
I mean the spirit of village - investing in relationships, support and mutuality.
Aim small and local.
Rich returns follow.
3. Know It’s All In Your Mind
“Worse has happened in my imagination than in reality”, wrote Seneca.
Financial collapse.
Global war.
Market crashing.
Company failing.
YOU failing.
Often the worst and most happens in the mind.
So the question becomes:
How to remain steady, to be more kelp, amidst all this?
This is a practise.
A path.
Rhythm.
Roots.
Ritual.
The LeanMind way.
One final thought.
If you were to practise subtracting one thing today, what would it be?
For me, it's social media.
Twitter.
Not forever.
Just today.
And you?
Email me. I’d like to hear.
Ben